So let’s play devil’s advocate here.

1. Anything is “art” purely if the “artist” says that it is. No other criteria apply. This is irrefutable and cannot be challenged.
2. The physical manifestation of a work of “art”, what the viewer sees, is utterly irrelevant. All that matters is the idea inside the “artist’s” head.
3. If a viewer does not understand a work of “art” then the fault lies 100% with the viewer. It is wholly an exemplification of their lack of intelligence, education and understanding.
4. What the greater public understand as artistic crafts and skills are merely a conceit, they are nothing to do with “art”.
5. The great masters; Raphael, Titian, Rubens, Rembrandt, Velazquez, Hals, Goya etc were not really “artists”. They were merely illusionists who sought to trick the viewer.